WSSN Stories

“The Audacity of Some People”

By Sion S. Habtemariam

Sion S. Habtemariam

By Sion S. Habtemariam

(written on November 16, 2012)

The re-election of President Barack Obama in November caught the attention of many Americans. Among these Americans are teens who use social networking sites as an opportunity to voice their opinions. Although tweets and status updates are unlimited; facts, in many cases are hard to find.

Some teens joke about being able to stay on food stamps now that Obama was re-elected without realizing they are playing into a crippling stereotype. Many teens influenced by parents, forms of media like FOX News, uninformed teachers,  and the judgments of other teens have come to a consensus that all Obama supporters are receiving government assistance and are unemployed. Some go to the extreme to over generalize that all the Democrat party stands for is to give government hand outs to people who choose to not work. These views are not only incorrect but display the ignorance plaguing America.

Many teens are not aware of the facts behind much of America’s past. The system of welfare existed well before the Obama administration and he is not to blame for those who may take advantage of the assistance. In 1935 the Social Security Act was enacted. Most Americans were unemployed or underemployed and it was nearly impossible for people to support their families. Sound familiar?

There are many forms of welfare; about 83% of money for social programs goes to social security and Medicaid (programs that every citizen is eligible for). Many do not know what the negative impact of the getting rid of welfare would be. Those who are angry that their family pays for all “poor” Americans through the money they receive through their small businesses would soon see the sad truth that not only would completely ending welfare hurt the people directly involved, but also their business.

People also choose to forget that the burdens of middle class paying for taxes are because many richer Americans pay lower taxes. Does it make sense that 21% of millionaires face a lower tax rate than the three million individuals making between $50,000 and $100,000? The system of welfare does need regulation. But in general Conservatives are opposed to regulation as seen in the Bush administration. Imposing rules like Bill Clinton did in his administration which gave states funding for the poor, but made it necessary to help citizens move from welfare to the workplace. Enforcing this, as well as making it mandatory for all recipients to bring proof of looking for a job through applications or by other means, may help. But times like these when even college educated Americans are out of work it may take a long time for this to happen. Also a program requiring drug testing prior to receiving government assistance should also be put in place.

Americans like to believe that our system of government and the truth behind the American Dream are what differentiate us from the most of the world. But there is another aspect to what makes us unique. We have policies put in place that allows us to have lower poverty rates and allow us to actually have a middle class.

Many teens have also expressed their opinion that this generation is going to be derailed by Obama’s administration. Ask these same students about Obama’s views on funding for education and you may receive blank stares. There are those who have actually been more instrumental in the sculpting of their views and may have more to say. For many high school students their next step in education is college. Most families cannot afford tuition and most of us do not have the option to just ask our parents for money as suggested by Willard Mitt Romney. The Obama administration has repeatedly increased funding for student financial aid through the support of Pell grants. His administration has also supported funding for elementary and secondary schools. This makes it even more astonishing that some teachers who are misinforming students are actually being protected under Obama’s measures.  Americans who supported Proposition 30 have faith in the next generation. This proposition stops school cuts and college tuition hikes. So students who believe that because of Obama they will not be able attend college anymore, I’m glad to inform you that you are mistaken. The Democratic Party, including President Obama, will not be to blame for this generation’s derailment. Instead it will be the students who do not exercise effort, those who use class as a time to socialize and apply make up in class instead of taking advantage of their resources who cheat themselves.

Aside from the politics, those who oppose Obama often have degrading things to say about something he could not control, his race. From the moment Barack Obama announced he would run for president, to his inauguration, and ultimately his reelection America reached a monumental point in its history. Obama becoming President made many believe that America had finally achieved the progression from racism of slavery and Jim Crow Laws. As a nation we have made strides from an oppressive nation but the battle on racism is ongoing. It’s 2012 and some people still have a hard time believing that the son of an African father and white American mother may have something to offer to America.

Students use Instagram as a canvas to display their racially charged attacks on the President of the United States. Students posted pictures with captions full of poor language that included the “N” word. On election night, various postings that discussed dissatisfaction of our two-term President would not have be complete without a regressive picture of a homemade billboard from Hanson, Massachusetts. The billboard stirred up much controversy in Massachusetts but as many as 46 Instagram users agreed with its message that “Somewhere in Kenya a village is missing its IDIOT OBAMA One Big a** Mistake America Vote Mitt Romney for 2012!”  If your beliefs do not coincide with those of our President that is fine, being able to openly disapprove of our government is a unique right many countries lack. Before taking to social media sites to express your anger fuelled opinions ask yourself a few questions. Do my statements over generalize an entire group of people? Are they my own thoughts? Do my statements lack facts and express hatred?

As you express your disdain for America’s current president I challenge you to leave behind your comfortable world and see a world with children less fortunate than you. And above all I challenge you to leave behind the mindset that makes it acceptable to judge someone’s abilities and strengths by their cultural background.

 


About the author

Sion worked at the Registrar of Voters in San Bernardino on election night in 2012 during her senior year in high school after being chosen among some of her peers in her AP Government class. She is currently a sophomore at University of California, Irvine where she is studying Public Health and Neurology with an emphasis on Pediatrics Neurology.

 

“Through the Looking Glass”

Members of National Sorority of Phi Delta Kappa, Inc. and Delta Rho Chapter for the Far Western Region

Members of National Sorority of Phi Delta Kappa, Inc. and Delta Rho Chapter for the Far Western Region

By Dr. Margret Hill

SAN BERNARDINO, CA The 2014 Teach-A-Rama “Through the Looking Glass” was held at San Bernardino Valley College (SBVC) on Saturday, September 20. Approximately 80 educators, professionals, and community members from San Bernardino City Unified School District, Fontana Unified School District, Redlands Unified School District, San Bernardino Community College District, Compton Unified School District,  Rialto Unified School District, Palm Springs Unified School District, San Diego Unified School District, Riverside Unified School District, and Los Angeles Unified School District participated in this event. The purpose of this gathering was to look at the different cultural elements students encounter in the classroom, providing educators with a closer look at the factors currently impacting minority students in the classroom.

Teach-A-Rama was sponsored by the Office of Instruction at San Bernardino Valley College working in partnership with representatives from the National Sorority of Phi Delta Kappa, Inc. and Delta Rho Chapter for the Far Western Region.

Following the welcome, the purpose of the event was shared by Dr. Haragewen Kinde (Vice President of Instruction at San Bernardino Valley College), Joyce Payne (Basileus with Delta Rho Chapter), and Dr. Margaret Hill (Board Member for the San Bernardino City Unified School District).

Presenters included: keynote speaker, Dr. Louie Rodriguez (Professor at California State University, San Bernardino and author of “The Time is Now”), Euricidi Fitz (PAR Consultant with San Bernardino City Unified School District), Keisha Handy (Academic Coach with Monterey Elementary School, part of San Bernardino City Unified School District), and Dr. Kennon Mitchell (Assistant Superintendent of Student Services with San Bernardino City Unified School District)

 

Teens and Saving: The First Car

Wendy Estrada

Wendy Estrada

By Wendy Estrada, Branch Manager, MUFG Union Bank, N.A.

Learning to drive and buying a car can be an exciting time, especially for teenage drivers, and it’s an important step toward adulthood.  While it may offer a sense of freedom and pride, it can also provide valuable lessons in responsibility and financial planning.  The following tips may help teens become financially prepared for their first car purchase.

Create a budget

The first, and perhaps the most important step, is to establish a budget listing all sources of income and the expenses of car ownership.  Determine if your parents, guardians or other family members might be willing to contribute.  Perhaps they will match your savings toward a down payment, or they might decide to buy the vehicle and have you make the payments.  Make sure your expectations are reasonable and clear.  List the costs associated with owning a vehicle, such as gas, insurance and maintenance.  Print your budget to clearly see what is expected and how much must be earned and saved.

Save

If you don’t already have one, set up a savings account as soon as possible.  Ask your parents or another trusted adult to take you to a bank and introduce you to a banker who can explain how making regular deposits can help you reach your savings goals, and how interest can help you grow your savings faster.  Your banker can also help you determine which type of savings account will best suit your needs.

Earn income

According to the Fair Labor Standards Act, as a general rule, to get a job with a company, you must be 14 years old, and certain limits apply to how many hours you can work until you turn 16.  Many teens also earn money by babysitting, tutoring, delivering newspapers, making and selling jewelry and other crafts online, or mowing lawns, for example.  Look for ways to put a skill or hobby to use to earn extra money, and with a little creativity and perseverance, you can make some extra cash doing things you enjoy.

Shop around

When your savings goal has been reached, it is smart to do a little research before shopping for a vehicle.  Whether you are able to buy a new or used vehicle will depend on your budget, and having realistic expectations before visiting the car lots will make the process a lot more fun. Read reviews such as Consumer Reports to find a make and model that is reliable and gets gas mileage that you can afford, and meets your needs.  Ask your parents to call their insurance agent and research insurance rates for the types of vehicles you are considering.

Manage costs

Keep track of your budget and make sure that you’re able to keep up with your bills, and look for ways to lower your expenses.  Keeping your car properly maintained can lower fuel and repair costs.  Regular oil changes and tire rotations can help keep your vehicle running smoothly and increase your gas mileage.  Consider asking for gas gift cards for birthday or holiday gifts.  And note that many insurance companies may offer you more favorable rates for maintaining a clean driving record and your grades.

Be a responsible driver

There are many responsibilities that come with owning a vehicle, but perhaps the most important is being a safe, responsible driver.  Obey the rules of the road to help avoid costly tickets and fines, or even worse, losing your license or hurting someone.               

The foregoing article is intended to provide general information about helping teens save for a car and is not considered financial or tax advice.  Please consult your financial or tax advisor.

 

ABOUT WENDY ESTRADA

Wendy Estrada is the branch manager of the Lincoln High School student-run branch for MUFG Union Bank, N.A.  MUFG Union Bank, N.A., is a full-service bank with offices across the United States.  We provide a wide spectrum of corporate, commercial, retail banking and wealth management solutions to meet the needs of customers.  The bank also offers an extensive portfolio of value-added solutions for customers, including investment banking, personal trust, capital markets, global treasury management, transaction banking and other services.  With assets of $108.8 billion (USD), as of June 30, 2014, the bank has strong capital reserves, credit ratings and capital ratios relative to peer banks.  MUFG Union Bank is a proud member of the Mitsubishi UFJ Financial Group (NYSE: MTU), one of the world’s largest financial organizations with total assets of approximately ¥259 trillion (JPY) or $2.5 trillion (USD)1, as of June 30, 2014.  MUFG Americas Holdings Corporation, the financial holding company and MUFG Union Bank, N.A. have corporate headquarters in New York City.

 

1 Exchange rate of USD=¥101.36 (J-GAAP) as of June 30, 2014

“In All Your Getting, Get Understanding!”

Lou Coleman

Lou Coleman

By Lou Coleman

When you get an understanding,  understand that it’s not your job to figure out how God is going to do what He said He would do. The Word of God is true, pure ,tried and it has already been settled in the heavens,  never to be changedSo, if God speaks, that settles it, Period!

We are to believe what He says, and  trust Him even when we don’t understand what is going on!  Can I tell you that trust requires us to have unanswered questions?  You need to get “comfortable – not knowing.”  Stop trying to figure everything out!  Stop “staring” at your circumstances and fix your eyes on Jesus, “the Author & Finisher of your faith.”  Mediate on His track record for He’s the same yesterday, today, and forever. Focus on the unlimited supply of the God we serve, the God of more than enough!

I tell you, it is important that you do not try to figure out, calculate, or reason how God is going to heal, deliver, set free, meet your needs, etc… rather you must just believe. When you try to figure out in your mind how God is going to do something, then you are not trusting. God never told us that faith required us to figure it out; rather faith requires us to rely on the truth and integrity of His Word. Can I help somebody right now. I know your figuring it out, is your back up plan, just in case God does not come through. But  I want you to know that anytime that you have a backup plan for God, then you are not believing Him.

You must begin to believe God first, and not require Him to prove that He can do it. God must become your salvation in all things. You are not to try to figure out how He is going to do what He promised to do. That’s His job.  Your job is to release your faith. You must release it and trust God. Psalms 37:5 says, “Commit thy way unto the LORD; trust also in Him; and He shall bring it to pass.” So stop trying to figure everything out! Put it away and raise your hands in Praise, thus saying “I trust you God, and I give it to you.” And when you pray, thank Him and expect Him to honor His Word, for  “this is the confidence that we have in Him, that, if we ask any thing according to His will, He hearth us.” Don’t try and figure it out any more, just let go and let God. It may not make sense right now, but one day when God’s whole plan unfolds you’ll see what God was up to.

Radio Personality and Author, Diana Wehbe, to Speak at Lupus Event

Diana Wehbe

Diana Wehbe

SAN BERNARDINO, CA- On Saturday, October 4 from 9 a.m. to 2 p.m., the Young Women’s Empowerment Foundation (YWE) in conjunction with the Southern California Black Chamber of Commerce will be hosting the 1st Community Wellness Event and Lupus Awareness Walk at the Community Medical Center Plaza Parking Lot located at 1800 Medical Center Drive in San Bernardino.

This is a FREE community. The theme for the day is “A Healthy Me” with special guest speaker Diana Wehbe, 99.1 KGGI Radio Personality and author. Other activities of the day include music, vendors, food, raffles, and community fun. There are also a limited number of Omnitrans Day Passes available. Free registration/sign-ups for teams can be completed by emailing ywefoundation@gmail.com.

Moving Grass Can Save Money And Create Jobs!

Royal Grass

BOTTOM LINE… Publisher’s Commentary by Wallace J. Allen

Water districts throughout California are reacting to the drought by offering a variety of rebates and incentives for residents to remove and replace the grass in their yards.  The goal is to replace grass with natural California desert loving plants that do not require as much water to survive.  Jennifer Aires, Water Resource Manager of the Yucaipa Valley Water District, was a guest on this past Sunday’s EMPIRE TALKS BACK radio program where she discussed the importance of saving water and some methods for doing so, which included removing grass from your yard.  She explained that some cities’ water districts are offering as much as $2.00 per square foot as incentive for residents to remove their grass.  The incentives must be arranged prior to the removal. Contact your water district to determine the process for qualifying to participate in the program.  Do not remove and replace your yard grass until your approval is made or you will probably not qualify for the rebate.

Jobs will be created by this program because of the fact that most people will not be able to do the yard work required for the removal and replacement.  Youth Build Inland Empire has a Landscape Training Program that is very capable of designing and completing a landscape that is water-friendly and that stays in the rebate-budget allowed by your water district.  Inland Empire residents have the opportunity to “save water and money while beautifying their yards and creating jobs and business opportunity at the same time,” by participating in state wide project to save water.

Call your water district to determine what incentives are offered to remove and replace your yard grass. Find out the process for qualifying for those incentives.  If you have the ability to remove and replace with your own resources, do so. If you are inclined to have someone else handle the project labor, I recommend you call I.E. Youth Build to help you at (909) 890-9106 and ask for Felix.

LETTER TO THE EDITOR: JOBS, LABOR TRADE, AND UNIONS

M_Id_406132_Amazon_Jobs

By Audrey Thompson

During this election season I have heard the Democratic Party telling African American voters why we have to get out the vote and vote for the Democrats, but here’s what I have to say about that.

Jobs, jobs, jobs! The unemployment rate for African Americans in the Inland Empire has always been the highest of all races and voting for some of the local Democrats have not changed that fact. Labor Unions and Trades certainly do not employ African Americans to the extent they can and they give the  most money to Democrats running for office. Yet, Democrats come to our community and expect us to vote for them, no questions asked. Democrats are owned by the Unions and will not speak out against the Unions and Labor on our behalf. For Democrats Union money is more important than our vote. Well let’s show them this election how powerful our vote is!

How many times have we had the conversation about driving down the freeway under construction and we see no African American working on that project? How many times have we drove by building and housing construction projects and did not see any African American working on that project?

Why is it that Labor Unions and Trades have Black Labor Unions and Trades divisions? No brainer, if the Unions and Trades were fair to our workers and black leadership representation, we certainly would not need a black division. It is almost impossible for Blacks to get apprenticeship positions in Labor and Trades. Yet again, Labor Union and Trades give the most money to Democrats locally, statewide and nationally. They are so bad out here in the Inland Empire that when it comes time for the Riverside/San Bernardino Central Labor Council Secretary/Treasurer, Laurie Stalnaker,  to interview candidates running for election, they don’t even invite African American candidates who have half a chance. She invites African American candidates who she knows will lose the race or have no competition in a race. CLC, Laurie Stalnaker, will not interview a viable black candidate in a significant powerful elected position. She has to be called on the carpet to interview certain African American candidates for the Union to interview for their endorsement.

And to add insult to injury, Miss Laurie is also a Delegate for the California Democratic party and a Delegate for Pete Aguilar. There have been several complaints against Laurie Stalnaker to the California State Democratic party for her racism and supporting the Republican candidate over the  Democrat candidate. The Democratic party has taken no action against her. Laurie Stalnaker has financed  Republican candidates that helped put the City of San Bernardino into Bankruptcy. However, if an African American Democratic candidate supports a Republican the same Democratic party will use their by-laws to not endorse the African American candidate.  I am telling you what God loves and that is the truth.

Black folk, please be informed. Let’s take a closer look at the candidates coming to our churches and community centers asking for our vote. Democrats know that 80% of African Americans who actually go to the polls and vote will vote for a Democrat no matter who the Democrat is and no questions asked! That is not the case with all other populations of voters. Be informed, hear what both parties have to say. Don’t just take for granted that the Democrat has your best interest at heart. Be informed!

What we need most are jobs and if the Unions Labor and Trades have the most invested in the Democrats who are asking for our vote maybe we should consider the other candidate. The only thing we have is our vote, and the only way to make the Democratic party understand we mean business is to vote for the other guy. How many times are we going to be hoodwinked, bamboozled and duped by our Democratic party?

‘DRIVEN Global’, the First African-American Owned Golf and Beverage Company Is Poised to Inspire Millions

IMG_2685NEW YORK, NY- The golf and beverage businesses will never be the same. The men behind DRIVEN Global, Mark Thierry and Greshaun Fulgham are single handedly shifting the landscape and trajectory of the world of golf and fine beverages. Under the DRIVEN Global umbrella lies the first ever African-American-owned golf brand, DRIVEN Golf and wine brand, DESTINY Moscato through Red Styxx Beverage.

It all began when Robert L. Johnson, the founder of Black Entertainment Television and America’s first African-American billionaire, introduced the two self-made millionaires Mark Thierry and Greshaun Fulgham. What resulted from this pairing, not only is an inspiring business partnership, but an incredibly strong friendship. Mark Thierry is an award winning entrepreneur from Texas with a successful career in sales, medical diagnostics and federal contracting. Greshaun Fulgham, from Washington DC, is international financier and real estate mogul. Opposites attract, yet their synergy is contagious. Where Thierry thrives off risk-taking, Fulgham masters structure. When Thierry was thinking national, Fulgham was going global. What binds them together is the dream.

Both Thierry and Fulgham want to de-mystify the perception of black men, to show the world, that with hard work, drive and intellect, African-American men can succeed, be dedicated fathers and husbands, collaborate and build successful partnerships, uplift their communities and change the world. With DRIVEN Global, change comes with one golf club and wine glass at a time. Their mutual core values of family, diligence, sacrifice, social responsibility and sustainable leadership are evident in all aspects of DRIVEN Global. For the partners, it’s all about dreaming big. Thierry stated: “The Dream involves the awareness that everyone has more to this life that they can strive for. The Dream that a golf club, or anything for that matter, can be a metaphor for someone making the best of themselves.”

The launch of DRIVEN Golf this Fall 2014 will be the first minority-owned golf brand dedicated to inspiring first-time golfers of color and urban socialites to jump into the game. Destiny Moscato is their exquisite-tasting aspirational American Sparkling Moscato, of Red Styxx Beverage, a subsidiary of DRIVEN Global. The Destiny Moscato launch will be taking place in Houston, Texas from October 2-4, 2014.

The fearless, collaborative drive of Mark Thierry and Greshaun Fulgham is the foundation of DRIVEN Global’s, multi-platform taste making brands. The two best friends, brought together by the visionary Robert Johnson, plan to follow in their mentors footsteps. “Our goal is to build a billion dollar business,” states Thierry. “We are starting a new legacy.” They have the perfect tagline…“Are you driven?” For more information check out drivengroupllc.com, driven-golf.com and DestinyMoscato.com. For all press inquiries, contact Theodore Palmer of Creative Edge PR at tpalmer@creativeedgepr.com.

A SUGGESTION FOR FIGHTING EBOLA…

BOTTOM LINE…PUBLISHER’S COMMENTARY BY WALLACE J. ALLEN

Dr. Ahmses Maat (left)

Dr. Ahmses Maat (left)

Preventing death from the Ebola virus is possible if it is true that the Ebola virus lives about 20 to 29 days, and if it is true, the virus must have high fever heat in order to achieve the deadly stage where the blood erupts from the capillaries. We are not sure the virus needs high fever heat in order to reach this stage, but we do know that high fever heat has been present in each case that death has occurred. Therefore we say “if” the patient can be cooled, MAYBE death will be prevented.

The concept is to ward off the high fever temperature associated with the bleeding out stage. If the patient’s body temperature is kept at 100 degrees Fahrenheit, well below the temperature that accompanies the bleeding out stage, the life-cycle of the virus can possibly complete without killing the patient.

How can patients prevent high fever temperature? We know that modern cooling methods require power and supplies that are not available, nor deliverable to where needed; however, we also know that there is a cooling method that is available to most victims and that it is basically free.

My friend and associate, Dr. Ahmses Maat, (Doctorate of Metaphysics,  Registered Respiratory Therapist, Certified Clinical Perfusionist, President of TaMeri Inc.),  is prescribing a  “Mud Bath Series” that allows the patient to cool as needed, either with the assistance of an aide or without. The ability to determine body temperature during the process is the one thing that may be a problem, thermometers are needed.

Dr. Maat suggests that a hole, two to three feet deep by four feet wide by six to seven feet long, be dug out from the ground. Half of the dirt should be placed back in the hole along with water to make the mud. A plastic liner can be used but is not necessary.  The patient should lay in the mud bath and cool him/her self as needed. This process should be repeated until the fever no longer returns.

We are aware of the social disruption that makes servicing the Ebola victims almost impossible.  It would be great to have 5000 doctors and 20,000 beds and the vaccine and “best practice” procedure to fight this battle, but until that occurs we must submit that reasonable care that does no harm should be afforded the victims.

As usual your comments are important; however, if you are able to communicate this concept to someone on the ground in West Africa, please do so.  We are not trying to “get paid,” we want to save lives.

 

 

Abused Women: Why They Stay, Why They Leave

Ray Rice and Janay Rice

Ray Rice and Janay Rice

By Jameelah Medina, PhD

We have all heard about (former) NFL player, Ray Rice, receiving a 2-game suspension for a domestic altercation with his former fiancée. Janay Rice, who is now his wife, explained that she was partially at fault for the violence that led to being unconscious in an elevator; however, most did not know the extent of the violence. We all know that it takes a serious amount of force to render someone unconscious, but the recent release of the entire surveillance video showing how she lost consciousness set off a storm. In short, the video shows Mr. Rice reaching for her before they enter the elevator. Once in the elevator, he strikes her. She responds by pushing him, and he hits her again hard enough to knock her to the floor. On her way down, her head hits a handle bar in the elevator. Once on the floor, she does not move; she is unconscious. He is forced to drag her seemingly lifeless body from the elevator and out of the building.

While many were appalled at his violent actions, many chose to focus on  Mrs. Rice. They asked questions like, “Why did she stay with him?” “How could she marry him?” “Why would she lie for him?” “How could she sit at that press conference and support him so publicly?” While it is very easy to judge an abused woman, her behavior and choices; it is actually better to try to understand the psychological nature of abuse and the psychology of the abused and battered.

Relationships hardly ever start out abusive. There is a process of breaking in and breaking down a victim. This process involves possessiveness, isolation, verbal and emotional abuse, and other tactics. Women who have experienced physical, emotional, sexual or other forms of abuse as girls are at greater risk for entering into an abusive relationship. For many, become accustomed to seeing violence as a way in which love is shown. Others may have low self-esteem in general or at least when it comes to romantic relationships. While others see potential in the abuser and believe that they can help the abuser change.

Many women, especially in the African American community, also have an aversion to involving the authorities in domestic disputes; they would rather take the abuse than offer their abusive partner up to the criminal justice system. Within the African American community, there is also the stigma of being seen as weak and the stereotype of “the strong, black woman.” This often keeps African American women silent about the abuse they suffer.

Over 85 percent of domestic violence (DV) or intimate partner violence (IPV) is against women, and one in every three women will experience IPV in her lifetime. More than 33% of teenage girls already report experiencing violence in a dating relationship. Abused women are often killed by their abusive partners, and the most dangerous time is when she is leaving or has just left the relationship. Roughly 72% of all murder-suicides are the result of IPV. It also takes roughly 7-8 attempts at leaving before the woman leave for the final time. Many often wonder why these women stay and judge them harshly for doing so. Just because a woman stays with her abuser does not mean that she does not want to end the abuse or leave the relationship. Most times, she has carefully weighed her options and the safest one is remaining where she is. She may remain in hopes of changing the abuser or simply to buy herself more time to plan a safe exit. Most people think of leaving as a one-time event. However, leaving an abusive relationship is a process. Once a woman is committed to leaving the relationship, it may take her months or even years before the process is finalized. And, until the very end, she runs the risk of losing her life to the abuser. If there are children involved, the leaving process is further complicated.

I do not particularly care for the NFL nor do I think they deserve applause for ending Ray Rice’s contract. However, I believe that this case represents an excellent time for our community to openly and honestly discuss DV and IPV, especially with our pre-teen and teen population.